I Promise

I rarely say “I promise” anymore. I remember as a kid and even as a teenager, the words “I promise” came out of my mouth regularly.  I’m not sure if that’s because we were younger and people assumed we rarely meant what we said, so they needed some sort of validation. Or, if promising things was just the cool thing to do (pinky promise, anyone?).

Are the words “I promise” just not necessary anymore because we are adults?  Do people just assume that, as an adult, you’re an honest person and that you’re going to do what you say you will?  

Even though the word “promise” rarely comes out of my mouth, I make promises all the time. When someone asks if I’ll save them cake and I say “of course”, that’s a promise. When I tell someone I will be somewhere at a certain time, that’s a promise.  I’ll argue that saying “I love you” is a promise – you’re promising someone that you’re there for them, that you care about them, that they can trust you.

I like to think I don’t break any promises I make to other people, but I’m sure I let a few slip away. Maybe I forgot about the promise or maybe I just decided to not care about keeping the promise.  I’m sure it happens more than I realize.

I do break promises to one person in particular. Myself.

“I promise I’ll go the gym today.”

“I promise I’ll take time to relax tonight.”

“I promise I won’t eat too much candy this week.”

“I promise I’ll stop spending money going out with friends.”

I tend to make excuses.

“I’m too tired to go to the gym today. I’ll just go tomorrow.”

“Oops. I ran out of time. I’ll just go to sleep and read tomorrow.”

“What can happen to me if I just eat one more piece of candy??”

“I know I shouldn’t, but this sounds so fun!! It won't be too expensive!”

Other broken promises include pretty much everything on any bucket list I’ve ever created. “This is the year I’m going to Enchanted Rock!!” – What I’ve said for 5 years in a row now. It’s on my current bucket list too. Let’s see if I make it there this year.

I’ll make another promise to myself: this year I’m going to try to accomplish most things on my bucket list. I tried to come up with easier goals, like read a book a month or have a BBQ on the beach, but we will see how it works out.

The hardest item on my bucket list is going to the gym 4 days a week (and going once a day for 30 days straight). Let’s see how this goes. I wrote the bucket list about a week and a half ago, and I have yet to go to the gym – off to a great start with this one!

When I write my bucket lists, I have a lot of motivation. THIS IS THE YEAR I’M FINALLY GOING TO DO THESE THINGS!!! And then a week after writing the list, I tend to forget what’s on it, or even worse, forget I even wrote the list in the first place.

It’s because my motivation just plummets after the initial excitement goes away, and with a lack of motivation, I can come up with tons of excuses for not doing things. Or, it’s because these things cost money – I can go months and months without buying myself clothes or jewelry, so even though I really, really want to go to the BYOB Paint Class, I can’t help but think I should/can spend that money on something or someone else.

I should have added “Complete bucket list and stop making excuses” on my bucket list this year.